5 Sex Offender Treats For Halloween

When you think of “trick or treating” you don’t think about some mid 40’s creep playing with his junk while he gives candy to your kids.

I live across the street.  Happy Halloween!

I live across the street. Happy Halloween!

So how do you protect yourself?  First you need to know where they are.

There’s a site where (FOR FREE) you can look up all of the perverts in your hood.

Then you can use this list of fun things to do on Halloween to registered sex offenders.

First Find Them at: http://www.familywatchdog.us/

Then Try These:

FUN Things to do on Halloween to Registered Sex Offenders

#1.  Make a sign, post it in their yard, that tells everyone what you just found out: sexoffendersign

Putting this up (or making your own personalized version) is great on a holiday that gets so much outdoor traffic.  Other tips:

  • Sidewalk Chalk
  • Spray Paint
  • Post Supporting Signs (example: Sex Offender @ 123 St “large arrow pointing the the correct direction, posted on busy cross streets”)
  • Print Up and staple gun to area telephone poles
  • Visit at 2-3am and write your message with round up

#2 “The Sting”  Get a high powered stun gun (or other protective non-lethal or lethal weapon pepper spray, nightstick), a costume that hides your identity, or use your kids as bait (or not).   Knock, Knock (you know the rest, but we can’t say it)

#3 “The Phone Trick”  Look them up, Call their PO (or leave an anonymous tip with the police), tell a big lie.  Who are they going to believe?

#4 “Crossing Guard”  Dress up like a crossing guard and defend the house from the youngsters during your locally posted trick or treat times.  It helps if you have a shirt or sign that explains what you’re doing.

#5 “Sneaky Treats”  This is up to your imagination, but I promise to make another post full of sneaky treat ideas.

Do not do anything listed above unless you agree not to sue us.

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3 responses to this post.

  1. What you are advocating is a violation of the law. Take a read of any sex offender registry posted by county sheriff departments and read the warnings against doing the things you are advocating.

    Reply

    • Posted by Kevin Roberts on October 23, 2009 at 9:52 pm

      Notice the last line of the post. We’re not telling anyone to “do” anything.

      Reply

    • Posted by Kevin Roberts on October 23, 2009 at 10:01 pm

      Read the “about” section, friend. This is a satire/humor site. Ever hear of a sense of humor? You should think about getting one.

      Reply

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